If you experience a lack of confidence, the good news is that you can change it. The only way you will build your self-confidence is to get out of your own head and accept that your subjective experiences may not be as straightforward as you think. Use that information to actively change your thought patterns to more realistic thoughts that motivate you to act positively in your life with confidence.

Your Thoughts Shape Your Life

While it's true that, as a human, you are a combination of your genetics and your environment, it's also true that you are in control of a lot more than you think, including your thought process.

Sure, you did not ask for your genetics, which makes you prone to be an introvert, shy, or worry – regardless, the way you think about the things that happen in your life will shape how your life feels to you. If you believe the things that happen are out of your control, you may feel overwhelmed.

If you are overwhelmed and unhappy, it's almost always due to how you think, and not due to your life being worse than someone else.

This is true whether you're ill or healthy, whether you have money or not, whether you were gifted a glorious genetic lottery, or if you feel you got the short end of that stick – it's still your thoughts that affect your behaviour and feelings. It is these thoughts that motivate your action or keep you from acting.

The good news is that your thoughts shape your life, and you are in control of your thoughts. This means you are the one who is ultimately in control of your confidence level, your success level, and your entire life.

Your thoughts shape your life, and once you are fully aware and mindful of the fact that you also control your thoughts, you can now actually control your life. There are no more excuses for finding success and experiencing life satisfaction while full of self-confidence.

Understand Your Thought Patterns

There are basic ways that most people think. These thought patterns are embedded in you. You don't usually actively think about each step in your thought pattern, and it's usually unconscious.

Learning your thought patterns and understanding more about how the human mind works can help you overcome all kinds of negative thought patterns and other blocks to your success.

• Pre-contemplation -- This is the time of thought when you're not mindfully thinking about your problems in a holistic way. Instead, you may even read things at this stage of your thought pattern and get offended because you've not fully explored it yet.

• Contemplation – When you are considering your thoughts at this stage, you're more likely to be able to connect your actions to consequences as you weigh the pros and cons of a situation or topic.

• Preparation – When you are mindful of your thoughts, you are ready to figure out what you can do about the problem to solve it at this stage of your thought process. You know you have a problem, and you know the choices before you, and you're ready to do something.

• Action – This is the point at which your thought pattern guides your behaviour. This is the time in the thought process that you act based on the goals you've set, the problem you've determined exists, and so forth. Usually, people at this point will act, or they'll ask for help to get someone else to take action.

• Maintenance -- This part of your thought process is needed to avoid creating bad habits that keep you stuck. Since you're mindful of your thought patterns, you can notice situations where you need to learn more, do more, and keep making changes.

• Termination – At this stage, you've managed your thoughts and actions to the point that you no longer do behaviours that are not leading you to the results you desire. For example, if you know that working out 20 minutes a day helps you maintain your weight and you're focused on the big picture instead of how you feel while you're working out, you're going to be more likely to do it because you've terminated or eliminated behaviours that don't produce the results you're seeking.

Keep in mind that this describes a healthy thought pattern. If you stop at contemplation, you may need to address what else needs to happen so that you can get out of your own way and achieve the goals and objectives. You can also actively push yourself through the thought cycle to affect change.

Aside from the general way that people think things through, you're also affected by generational influences, cultural differences, and other outside forces that affect how you think or judge any situation.

The thinking you want to most encourage is considered the most useful is the ability to use insightful thinking. Insightful thinking focuses on solving problems. First, you note the problem, find the various solutions, choose one of the solutions and then implement the solution. When it comes to changing your old thought patterns, there are many ways to break the cycle.

Face Unpleasantness Don't Avoid It

When you're able to put your feelings in their place, it's a lot easier to face unpleasantness so that you can get it over with faster. As you deal with issues, even the unpleasant ones, the moment you've created a solution, with practice, you'll develop confidence in your ability to overcome and succeed.

Become Solution-Focused

When faced with any problem, focus on the solution to that problem instead of the problem. For example, if you believe you're overweight, the solution is to eat less and lose weight. Focus on finding ways to eat less so you can lose weight instead of sitting around thinking about being fat.

Take Action: Click on the link to receive "The Power of Focus" free for 21 days and create the habit of focusing on the results you want in your life.

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